


Path Not Taken

by TenSpencerRiedPlease



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Iron Man (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst with a Happy Ending, BAMF Bruce Wayne, BAMF Tony Stark, Bruce Feels, I Don't Even Know, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, M/M, Protective Bruce Wayne, Tony Angst, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, all the feels really, but its somethin, seriously bois I've got no idea what this is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-13
Updated: 2018-04-13
Packaged: 2019-04-22 06:09:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,051
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14302521
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TenSpencerRiedPlease/pseuds/TenSpencerRiedPlease
Summary: There were plenty of things Tony predicted about his life but the two things he expected the least was listening to a hip-hop musical about the American founding fathers and actuallylikingit and being in business with Bruce Wayne. The first one for obvious reasons, but the second thing had more to do with the fact that Stark Industries and Wayne Enterprises were direct competitors in business.





	Path Not Taken

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sure about the end here but you know what, I'm feeling lazy and I wanted to post so here this is lol.

There were plenty of things Tony predicted about his life but the two things he expected the least was listening to a hip-hop musical about the American founding fathers and actually _liking_ it and being in business with Bruce Wayne. The first one for obvious reasons, but the second thing had more to do with the fact that Stark Industries and Wayne Enterprises were direct competitors in business. It made sense that he’d never work with the guy but shit happens and now he had no choice but to examine the only meaningful way he could continue his work.

Bruce Wayne, Tony would begrudgingly admit, is more attractive in person. “A miniaturized arc reactor?” he asks, not buying what Tony was selling if his tone was any indication. He’d really not like to call that bluff but he isn’t in much of a position to bargain either.

“Yeah, that’s what I said.” It’s potentially something that could make Bruce millions, and would have made SI millions if his asshole father and his even bigger of an asshole business partner didn’t kick him out of the business before he could do anything useful.

Bruce smiles and shakes his head, “you know I know that’s not possible, right? Honestly Stark the least you could have done was waste my time on something that wasn’t blatantly absurd,” he tells him, moving to stand.

Tony makes a last ditch effort to save his own ass because he hates his job as a mechanic- it’s a shit job for even shitter pay and almost everyone in the shop is fucking _clueless_ with cars. “I already made it,” he says quickly, playing his hand in full in a way he has always taught not to do. But desperate times and all that.

This gives Bruce pause. He turns back to face Tony, still standing, “well the proof is in the pudding Stark, where is it?” he asks.

Damn. Of course he’d ask for proof, which is only fair, but still. Tony has a small inkling of hope that Bruce is secretly as stupid as the media portrays him. Unfortunately, or maybe fortunately, Tony knew that the media wasn’t often right so he had come in prepared to deal with someone intelligent. No one makes as much money as Bruce based on dumb luck alone- someone, even if that someone isn’t Bruce, has to be pulling the strings and efficiently too. Still, he’s in a tight spot and he has to hope that Bruce will give him some wiggle room.

He pulls the reactor from his coat pocket and tosses it to Bruce, who catches it without actually looking away from Tony. He doesn’t seem to realize he’s done this until his fingers curl around the edge of the reactor. For a moment he just stares at it, frowning. “This… does this _work_?” he asks, clearly shocked.

Tony rolls his eyes, “no, I came here to sell you what would essentially pass as a nightlight halfassed hoping for a more permanent position. Yeah, obviously it works, Wayne,” he says sarcastically.

“Gotta admire the sheer balls it takes to have attitude with the guy that’s basically holding your future in your hands, Stark. But then you’ve always been a risk taker,” Bruce says. Tony barely resists the urge to flip him off. “Don’t look at me like that, we all saw your very public fallout with your father. Your insults should be printed on cards, they’re hilarious. I’ll tell you what though- you prove to me this thing works, and that you aren’t just a one hit wonder and I’ll _consider_ working with you.”

Tony sighs because he didn’t have any choice but to say yes and judging from Bruce’s calculating smile he knew it too.

*

When Tony first came in Bruce was shocked that he had made a mini reactor- from his knowledge of Tony Stark the man was only good at making things blow up and that wasn’t his style. If Bruce and Tony were on a spectrum when it came to weapons they were on opposite ends of it. Tony stupidly thought weapons were a great idea, and Bruce lost his parents to gun violence. He wasn’t stupid enough to think violence solved anything, which was half of why he operated the way he did. It would be easy to just punch villains and throw them in jail but he knew that wasn’t really a solution- jail was just criminal school and it didn’t solve the real issue of why people commit crimes to begin with.

That was why Bruce spent a lot of money on education, health, and finding some kind of solution for poverty. When people got desperate they did desperate things- Bruce could hardly blame them for it, especially in an unforgiving system that favored men like him. Most petty criminals were shocked when they ran into Batman only to essentially get a free therapy session or so Harley joked. Higher level criminals were the ones he typically had less sympathy for- they mostly recreated the system that put them in their positions to begin with except with more overt violence. He had no patience for that but jail still wasn’t a great option. Plus sticking a bunch of criminals who hated him in one spot seemed like a pretty stupid idea to him.

Point was there wasn’t a time when he had considered that he and Tony Stark would ever work together thanks to a number of differences, most of them being with weapons manufacturing, but here they are. As it turns out Tony is full of ideas for all sorts of things that aren’t weapons and the designs are actually good once he proves they work. Most of what he shows Bruce looks flat out impossible but Tony is… a lot less of an idiot than the media makes him out to be. Bruce knows a thing or two about making people see what they want to see and nothing else, but he actually _works_ at making people think he’s a self-absorbed asshole. Tony seems to have constructed the exact same persona as he has except completely by accident.

This isn’t to say that Tony isn’t an asshole though. He certainly has his moments to say the least, but for the most part Tony is… intelligent, quick witted, and _extremely_ detail oriented. His process for testing his products is extreme even to Bruce but the results pay off- literally. When he had first launches Tony’s reactor he expects a good profit but had wondered why Tony opted to take a smaller sum of money up front and a larger portion of the profits later but when sales skyrocket to unprecedented proportions he realizes why. In a single week he goes from being slightly behind Stark Industries in profits to considerably ahead. And in the subsequent month that follows, and three new products from Tony, his company sees profits no one even considered possible before they hired him. Needless to say Tony Stark ends up being more useful than Bruce predicted, and more like him than he originally thought too not that he’d find that out until later.

*

“You _baked_ it?” Bruce asks, frowning at the phone Tony pulled out of the oven not long before. Obviously the heat sensors in the phone have gone off but Tony is hoping the way he constructed the phone would mean it’d work again when cooled down. There’s obviously only one way to test that.

“Yeah, some customers accidentally bake their phones. It happens,” he says and Bruce frowns.

“To _whom_? Seriously, who the hell is baking their phones?” he asks.

Tony shrugs, “some random person on Twitter. Also the phone is waterproof. Well, water resistant technically. You can’t deep sea dive with it- it’ll start crapping out at around a depth of one hundred and seven feet,” he says.

Bruce shakes his head and runs his fingers through his messy black hair. It looks almost like it has been styled that way and Tony envies the effortlessness of it. “How did you even figure that out?” he asks.

“Uh, I threw a phone in some water? How else would I test that? Oh- and I completely reinvented the operating system. I mean you technically didn’t sell stuff like this and god knows my petty asshole of a father would whine and cry and throw a multimillion dollar lawsuit at you if he thought it looked too much like my old system. So I made a whole new thing based on fixing every flaw the last system I made had and also adding cool new things,” he says. Also the design looks way cooler and its a bit more user friendly than his last attempts at this sort of thing.

Bruce considers the phone for a moment, picking it up and examining it. He fiddles with the phone for a moment and Tony watches, curious to see how fast he’d pick up the system. It takes him four minutes to find everything Tony wants him to, most of which were things he expects Bruce specifically to look for. “This… is actually better than the systems I use. Do you have a computer version of this?” he asks and Tony grins.

“I thought you’d ask that. Yes,” he clarifies when Bruce raises an eyebrow at him.

“You continue to impress me,” he says. “And Stark Industries is getting worried, I can feel it. Something tells me they assumed the wrong Stark was their golden goose,” he murmurs.

What he’s really asking is why he and Howard had a falling out. Bruce isn’t a direct man- he dances around things, makes his transitions smoothly, and then you’re giving up information you think you’re doing it freely and of your own volition. Its impressive, staggeringly so, and speaks to an organized, methodical type. Ordinary people don’t consider their words like Bruce does, especially not with the intent of having you give up information to them. It took time for Tony to catch his manipulations but once he did Bruce didn’t find him so easy to talk to.

“Of course they were wrong,” Tony says. “Both Howard and Obadiah have underestimated how much work I’ve been doing over the last couple years or so. The only reason the company went from a multi million dollar company to a multi billion dollar company was because of me.” His work, however much he dislikes it now, made them soar above the rest in ways no one could have predicted at the time.

For a long few moments Bruce considers him, _really_ considers him. “You’re not what I expected, Tony,” he says, squinting a little like he expects to see something in Tony that he can’t see normally.

“That’s true for most people who know anything about me,” he says honestly. The real question there is why he chooses to hide so much of who he is, but Bruce likes games. Actually he likes puzzles in particular and he’s very good at them. Tony has tested this a few times; curious about Bruce because he isn’t what Tony expected either. What he’s most curious about though is why Bruce plays stupid quite a bit- his intentionally dulling himself to the media makes sense, but it’s the lying to his business partners, investors, and anyone else who isn’t his butler that _really_ piques Tony’s interest.

“I’m going to a charity event tonight,” Bruce says and Tony wrinkles his nose.

“Always hated those. The events, not the charities,” he clarifies needlessly. Bruce already knows what he means because Bruce is shockingly observant. He plays down that ability too and to huge extents. If Tony hadn’t been watching for signs of inconsistencies he never would have noticed this fact. But he does pay attention and for someone who plays at being self absorbed Bruce is bad at his follow through. No one who only pays attention to themselves remembers people’s coffee orders after hearing them only once, remembers when Tony eats or more accurately when he doesn’t, and he always remembers the last thing Tony ate if he saw him eat it too. Most people don’t seem to notice this about Bruce, but Tony does and he wonders why Bruce goes through a lot of effort to distract people from his extreme attention to detail. It’s a useful thing to have as a CEO so there has to be a motivation for it.

“This one is in support of abused kids, mostly from underprivileged positions,” he says and Tony looks up at him.

“Thought you were more of an education and poverty kind of guy?” he asks. Bruce is heavily involved in charity work, most of which has something to do with education especially, but poverty work and healthcare are high in his list of priorities.

“I am, but I’m of the personal belief that you can care for several causes at once. I mentioned it though because I was hoping you would come with me,” he says, offering Tony a smile that’s far too attractive to trust. He has a motivation.

“For what purpose?” he asks, squinting a little at Bruce like that will help him determine what Bruce is trying to figure out.

Bruce’s smile grows wider, “is this not how you ask people on a date?” he asks.

Tony frowns, “odd idea for a date,” he points out.

“Only if you didn’t care about the cause and you decidedly _do_ , so would you like to come or not?” he asks, not losing any of his confidence. Its more attractive than it has a right to be, which is probably why he agrees.

*

Bruce grins at Alfred, “I was right about his past with abuse- likely his father if his hatred of the man is any indication,” he says. Though his interest in pleasing his father is more… puzzling to Bruce. Why would an abused child seek the approval of their abuser? It makes no sense to him.

“Were you now? And just what put that idea into your head?” Alfred asks, not looking up from the newspaper he’s reading.

“He dislikes charity events but agreed to come with me to one,” he says.

“And that proves your theory how?” Alfred asks. “Because all that proves to me is that he apparently finds you attractive enough or interesting enough to liven the event up enough to make it worth going to.”

He shakes his head, “If Tony doesn’t want to do something he doesn’t full stop. Besides that he showed no interest until I told him what the charity money was going to. Abused kids,” he says though Alfred wouldn’t need the help to figure that out.

Alfred finally looks up from his paper, “and what are you playing at, exactly?” he asks. What he really means is to ask what Bruce’s motivation for his interest in Tony is. The thing is that he doesn’t really know himself. Tony is brilliant, observant, attractive and more but he’s met plenty of people with all or most of those qualities. So what is it that makes Tony different? “You don’t know, do you?” Alfred asks, amused with this. “Perhaps its his family that piques your interest?” he asks in that knowing tone he gets sometimes when he catches something Bruce doesn’t.

These days that didn’t happen often if ever. Bruce has long ago learned to notice everything around him all while pretending he doesn’t notice much of anything mostly thanks to Alfred but his own self-discipline helps quite a bit. Clearly he has more insight here though because his comment has Bruce confused. “His family?” Bruce asks, frowning.

Alfred nods. “Its been a long time since you were a part of one and I think some part of you wonders why Tony would throw his away. It’s a concept so foreign to you that it draws you in on a subconscious level,” he says.

Bruce shakes his head, “I understand why he threw his family away, they were abusive,” he says like its obvious. It isn’t, Tony hides it well, but quite a few of his frequent habits indicates a troubled past but his sleeping habits were what tipped Bruce off. From there he followed the evidence and came to his correct conclusion.

“You don’t understand at all,” Alfred says. “Tony never threw his family away, that’s just how you perceive things because that’s what _you_ would do in his place. Or what you think you would. Tony’s family threw him out though, and you wonder why he didn’t react the way you deem correct. You want answers to a puzzle you’re unable to solve from afar and Tony’s trust issues and hyper vigilance make it difficult to pry your answers out the usual way. People aren’t puzzles Bruce, and if he suspects your motivations he will not react well. Accept that family means something different to you than it does to him and leave him be,” he tells Bruce.

He tilts his head to the side, considering Alfred’s words. They aren’t wrong, not exactly, but there’s something missing in the analysis that Bruce can’t quite name. “My interest extends beyond that,” he all he says before he makes himself scarce. Alfred can find him of course- he’s the one who taught Bruce his skills and try as he might he hasn’t quite surpassed Alfred in his abilities to hide himself well. It was half the reason for the distracting persona after all. Alfred doesn’t follow though, doesn’t press his point. Its his way of telling Bruce that he can continue if he wants- that his disagreement was known but not pressing enough to pester Bruce about it. Bruce appreciates it because Tony is… interesting. An enigma and he’s always enjoyed figuring things out, even before his parent’s death made it necessary.

*

Bruce picks Tony up ten minutes ahead of schedule, or he tries but Tony is perpetually late- something Bruce should know by now. “You _live_ here?” Bruce asks, looking around the ratty apartment he’s currently living in. “Thought you got a payout from that reactor that would get you something better than _this_ ,” he says.

Tony shrugs, “sure I did, but I have different plans with that money and I can deal with this for now.” Its not exactly where he wants to be, but it will do for the time being.

“Different plans than decent housing? Is… is that _mold_ over there?” he asks, looking into Tony’s living room space.

“None of your business we’re late,” he says, pushing Bruce out the door before _he_ became Bruce’s charity for the night. From the look on Bruce’s face he hasn’t succeeded in his goal.

“Tony if you need help-” he starts but Tony cuts him off.

“I don’t. I told you, I have plans and I’m saving for them,” he says.

“Expensive plans, then, if you’re doing your best to save by living in health hazards. Can’t follow through on your plans if your apartment makes you sick,” he points out, worry still underscoring his tone but Tony shakes his head.

“I don’t need your help Bruce,” he says again.

“Don’t want it,” Bruce corrects. “Which means your plans are at odds with me somehow. My guess is that you’re looking to start your own company, then?” he asks and Tony frowns. Bruce laughs though, “simple deduction, really,” he says in way of a real explanation.

“Okay Sherlock, you got me,” he says, waving his hands around. What he really wonders is how Bruce came to that conclusion. Its not exactly a normal conclusion to come to- most people would assume he had too much pride, not that he’s looking to start his own company. Or that he wouldn’t accept Bruce’s help because he’d be a competitor.

Bruce frowns at him as he opens Tony’s door- second nature to him, clearly he’s done this before _and_ it’s not something he thinks much of. “I would have figured I gave you a good enough job- it pays well, it could pay better,” he says.

Tony shakes his head; unsurprised that Bruce is still trying to find a way to help him. “That’s not really my motivation,” he says as he slides into the passenger seat of Bruce’s car. Nothing about this model is familiar on the inside and Tony frowns as Bruce’s face betrays his confusion. He shuts the door on Tony though, using his few seconds of time to think before he gets to his own door.

“And what are your motivations?” he asks as he moves into his own seat.

“Preferably to ruin Howard, but I’ll settle for bankrupting him,” he says.

That clearly throws Bruce off but he shakes his head, “you’re giving him a run for his money now,” he points out. “Plus I legally own a good portion of your new designs and operating systems, you’d have to start over completely. That’s a lot of work for a goal you can complete in your current position.”

Tony raises his eyebrows at Bruce, “would you really be as willing to get your hands as dirty as I would? Something tells me you have a lot more honor than I do.” ‘Something’ is the way Bruce operates his business and the way he engages with near everything around him. Bruce sits on a high level or morality and he expects those around him to possess the same standards he has. Tony decidedly isn’t that good of a person and to do what he wants he doesn’t need to be. Or want to be really. He’s probably a little too comfortable with his skewed moral compass.

“And something tells me your revenge plot isn’t really going to solve your problems,” Bruce says.

“And something tells _me_ this date is going to go badly if you play therapist,” Tony tells him.

It shuts Bruce up for about a half a second before he speaks again. “Personally I think you already got revenge, the kind that’s rather cruel without ever meaning to be,” he says softly as he drives.

Tony raises an eyebrow, “what makes you say that?”

He half smiles, showing off a dimple he shouldn’t have. It annoys Tony. “You took what could have been Howard’s greatest piece of work- something that mostly turned into a media spectacle based on how expensive and ridiculous it was, and turned it into something marketable. And it wasn’t just marketable; it’s three hundred times smaller, significantly more efficient, and has none of the problems of the original. On top of all that the design was so different from Howard’s that you could really only say that it was loosely based on his reactor and he couldn’t take any legal action against you. His greatest achievement became a laughing stock that you turned into a multi million-dollar success, and to add insult to injury you sold it to his competitor. I’m not sure revenge gets any harsher than watching the kid you assumed was useless wipe the preverbal floor with your own ideas but better in every way.”

“I’m sure it stung but I’m more of a total annihilation kind of guy,” he says.

“You don’t need to do much to do that,” Bruce tells him. “If you want him to suffer you don’t need to destroy him, just dwarf him. Howard is an arrogant prick obsessed with his own image, his legacy. A legacy he thought he’d continue through you and since that obviously isn’t going to happen make your own. He thinks you’ll be a footnote in his story. Make sure the opposite is true and I promise you that will destroy Howard on levels you couldn’t do in any other way. And also I get to keep my new golden goose. Win- win,” Bruce says, smiling at him in a way that shouldn’t look so endearing.

Tony frowns, “why do I get the feeling you’re telling the truth?” he asks.

“Because I don’t lie often and when I do its necessary. That and I’m right- trust me, psychology is a specialty of mine, I have a background in it,” he says.

“Not one that’s listed in any of your credentials,” Tony says.

“My experience isn’t the kind of experience that earns a credential,” he says.

*

Tony holds a tight control for someone Bruce knows to be something of a party boy. Curiously though he avoids all things alcohol, suggesting that not only does he not drink it, but he must have had problems with it in the past. Interesting since an addiction never made it to the media and tabloids love that kind of thing. The other interesting thing is how easily Tony interacts with kids. Bruce has never been good with them- children were confusing territory to him even when he was one thanks to his controlled nature and highly educated speech patterns. Children his age never seemed to know what he was saying and as an adult his ability to speak to kids has not improved.

It’s clearly not something Tony struggles with though and watching him interact with children is strangely endearing considering he has no real interest in kids. Maybe its because the way people interact with children says things about who they are so thus far he’s not getting anything negative from Tony. “You know for someone who took an interest in charity for kids you’re not very comfortable with them,” Tony notes, raising an eyebrow.

Bruce shrugs, “children are social on a level I prefer not to be,” he explains. They’re all so curious, so eager to learn and while those traits are positive and welcome in most situations children always tended towards subjects that make him uncomfortable. Usually family and hobbies- with dead parents and his spare time spent dressed as a bat fighting crime he doesn’t care for the topics children do.

“You don’t really like being social on any level, not really anyways. You put on a good show but something else is happening underneath that,” Tony says, squinting a little at Bruce like this will help him figure Bruce out.

It hits a little too close to home so Bruce laughs, “sure, Tony. I can’t imagine what drew you to that conclusion.” Nothing that he’d be able to pick up on Bruce is sure of that- he works hard to look innocuous.

“Plenty of things. Like the fact that you’re _highly_ intelligent but play stupid, you have reflexes that are better than most anyone I’ve met and I’ve met some talented people, your observation skills are off the charts, and your car has been completely gutted and everything but the frame has been replaced with what I can only describe as armor. That doesn’t even cover all the odd things about your charity work, your relationship with your butler, and the way you hold everyone who could get close to you at arms length or better minus the aforementioned butler. My guess is that he knows something about you the rest of us don’t. But knowing you it isn’t something disparaging- you’re a genuinely good person even if you try hard to seem selfish. Nothing about you adds up,” he says, dark eyes examining Bruce for cracks in his armor.

Normally Bruce is sure when people look at him they don’t find much but a party boy with a soft interior- its not like he does much to hide his charity work- but he also works to look more like a bumbling fool than he is. Tony clearly sees past it though and that… makes him curious. “What makes you think any of those observations are true?” he asks and Tony laughs softly.

“One, I know intelligence when I see it and no one has business luck like yours based on nothing _but_ luck. You need to know what you’re doing and you keep more secrets than the government. No one else but you is running the show. Two, contrary to popular belief I am not as self absorbed as I appear- I’m only a little bit of a narcissist, not a full blown self-obsessed ass. But I know one of those when I see one too and you are not selfish, not in the least, and anyone who truly lives up to a reputation like yours would never go for an alcohol that’s basically water. That I know from experience,” he says, looking away for a moment out of what Bruce would call guilt. So he had been right to guess that Tony has had problems with alcohol in the past.

“Maybe I prefer lower alcohol contents,” he says and Tony shakes his head.

“Someone who parties as much as you supposedly do would have an alcohol tolerance that wouldn’t allow for anything less than hard liquor, Bruce. And someone who parties as much as you supposedly do would have a minor addiction at least. Again, I know from experience,” he says, the last bit coming out a little softer than the rest.

“You’re not narcissistic or self absorbed, you’ve just been raised in an environment that wouldn’t allow you to act in any other way. If you were truly anything like your father you wouldn’t have always felt a little uncomfortable with your reputation and you wouldn’t have tried to bury that in alcohol. And you’d be rude to the kids,” he adds. Tony raises an eyebrow and Bruce shrugs, “people with your father’s mentality think cruelty builds character. Its not a sentiment you share.”

Tony shrugs, “people who treat kids badly are cowards,” he says simply. Its not something Bruce is inclined to disagree with.

*

When Tony wakes up its to the smell of breakfast cooking so he cracks an eye open in an attempt to figure out what the hell is going on. Its not like he ever makes breakfast himself and when he looks at the clock he almost dies tripping on his pants from the night before because he’s almost four hours late to work. “You sleep late naturally. Didn’t take you for the type,” Bruce says from the doorway and Tony just about leaps out of his own skin.

“What the _hell_ Bruce? Where did you- wait, did you go home and change then come back?” he asks, noting that Bruce is wearing far more comfortable clothing than the suit he was in last night.

He laughs again, “apparently you’re observant in the morning too,” he says. “And don’t worry about being late for work when the CEO calls in for you people don’t question it.”

Tony stares after him for a moment, blinking a few times to try and gather his bearings because he’s _confused_ but the smell of food proves more pressing to him. “Do I smell bacon?” he asks a little tentatively. Bruce nods and Tony squints as he tries to remember if he even _has_ bacon in the apartment.

“You didn’t,” Bruce tells him, obviously seeing the question on his face.

“You… bought breakfast?” he asks. “Wait, you know how to cook?”

Bruce laughs softly, “maybe not so observant in the morning. Come here, you have food to eat,” he says. Tony cant help but feel vaguely like a kitten being taken care of by its mother but he follows after Bruce anyways, making a beeline to the nearest cupboard out of curiosity and suspicion more than anything. When he opens it he finds a bunch of foods there that weren’t there the day before and he looks over to Bruce, who gives him a small, innocent smile. “In my defense you didn’t even have _eggs_ \- they’re a household staple and since the one single sausage in the fridge indicates you don’t have a vegan diet I thought I’d help you out.”

“I don’t need the help, Bruce,” he mumbles. It’s strange to be on the other end of this. It occurs to him that all those times he helped Rhodey or Pepper out in the past they had felt the way he feels now. Uncomfortable and vaguely annoyed if still grateful.

“You clearly needed the help, Tony. That lonely sausage indicates you can’t cook to save your life,” he says and Tony makes an annoyed noise.

“I do fine, thanks,” he mumbles. He doesn’t but that annoys him more because cooking is chemistry that tastes good and he’s good at chemistry so why can’t he cook? Stupid.

Bruce clearly doesn’t believe him but he says nothing, handing Tony a plate instead. The food looks better than anything Tony could have prepared and he sighs, taking it and giving the food a sniff before he shrugs and decides its more edible than anything he would have produced. Bruce watches as he eats, making sure he actually eats Tony thinks, before he grabs his own plate and asks about Tony’s latest ideas.

*

Tony has a knack for finding new markets and exploiting them, Bruce finds, and thankfully he’s decided to stay with Wayne Enterprises for the time being because he’s making Bruce a stupid amount of money. It makes expanding his charity work a little easier, and even better it means he regularly gets new idea for his bat suit. Tony doesn’t like Gotham much, he’s always complaining about it, but most of what he complains about lately is Batman. Thankfully Tony has _plenty_ of ideas on how to improve the suit, his armor, and quite a few other things that Bruce notes and then works on. He knows full well whatever Tony would produce would absolutely be better than his attempts but he’s noticed an improvement in his ability to function nonetheless.

That’s probably where he first slipped up. Actually no, that’s _exactly_ where he first slips up but he doesn’t much realize it until Tony is frowning over a paper in his office eating lunch with Bruce. “First of all I don’t know who ‘Clark Kent’ is but he seems like a real prick. Also why the hell does he think that Batman is using my technology? I’ve never even met Batman and honestly I have no interest in a furry that expects people to take his vigilante justice seriously,” he says, rolling his eyes.

Bruce keeps his calm, barely, and reaches for the paper, pulling it from Tony’s grasp. He skims the article but only finds touches of Clark in it- its his co-writer’s name that catches his attention. Lois Lane. The woman is frighteningly competent at her job when it comes to investigation and it had been stupid of him to think someone wouldn’t notice he was using Tony’s ideas. He should consider himself lucky that Tony hadn’t been the first to figure it out.

“Clark Kent doesn’t even work in this city, who even printed this?” he mumbles more to himself than Tony.

“Who cares about Kent, Batman is stealing my ideas and I’ve never even met this ridiculously dramatic furry,” Tony says, glaring at the news paper.

Bruce resents being called a furry because his suit has nothing to do with anything furry related. Though he can’t deny dramatics when he considers his motivations for the bat, not that he can divulge any of this information to Tony. “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery,” he says instead, setting the paper aside.

“Imitation can suck my dick- what the hell is some random bat guy doing with my tech?” Tony asks.

“Are you sure its yours?” Bruce asks, finding his loophole quickly as always. It isn’t Tony’s, not in a true sense, and if he got close enough- which he wouldn’t- but if he did he’d know immediately its not his. The ideas were, but the execution? Tony is far more competent than he is when it comes to inventing. Lucius might rival Tony’s abilities but Bruce just doesn’t have the talent the two of them do- or did in Lucius’ case.

“The connections Kent drew were pretty compelling,” Tony notes.

“Lois,” Bruce corrects, earning a raised eyebrow from Tony. “Clark’s abilities to write are excellent, but Lois is the better investigator. Always has been so the connections are hers, the words are Clark’s. Besides that similarities don’t necessarily indicate much,” he notes.

Tony sits back with his sushi and considers this for a long few moments while he waves a pinched sashimi piece around. He almost loses it but manages to stuff it in his mouth before it makes a mess. “I’m just saying I reserve the right to kick Batman’s ass,” he mumbles around his food.

Bruce can’t help but laugh at that, shaking his head. “I can guarantee that will be physically impossible,” he tells Tony. Try as he might, and he _would_ try, tony simply wouldn’t be able to get past Bruce’s defenses. He’s only been training since he was eight or so- Tony’s loss is only natural in the face of that.

“Dude dresses up as a bat- I could kick his ass,” Tony says with maybe too much confidence.

“Mhm,” Bruce murmurs, letting Tony think that its possible to beat him in a fight. Maybe of intellect, but physically? Bruce has him outstripped easily, but its cute to watch him consider the possibilities. Tony's determination, Bruce has decided, is a sticking point of attraction for him. And of course there's the fact that he's always thinking, moving forward, and  _doing_. Action looks good on Tony and Bruce will always be happy to watch him work, even if its on plans for a fight against someone he'd never win against. Its endearing.

*

The first time Tony meets Batman it’s a fluke really. He’s taking a short cut back to his apartment, one he’s taken dozens of times before, but this time someone happens to pull a gun on him. He eyes the model and rolls his eyes, “go ahead and pull the trigger, there’s an eighty percent chance it’ll jam,” he says with confidence. If there’s anything he can trust about Justin Hammer its his absolute incompetence in weapons development.

“You really want to take that chance?” his would-be shooter asks and Tony shrugs.

“I know my guns and I know my stats. Chances are in my favor,” he says flippantly.

The shooter steps closer and Tony quickly examines the situation here, sparing a quick glance around the ally. Yeah, the odds are in his favor. So when the shooter gets in range Tony grabs the muzzle of the gun in his hands, points it away, and then drop kicks his attacker just as someone new drops- literally- into the ally. Tony squints at Batman as the gun is snatched from his hands and tosses away with an obvious distaste as Batman advances on his attacker.

“Jesus I can’t believe I’m meeting the crime fighting furry in person. Stop using my tech, you’re obviously altering it and you aren’t as good as I am at inventing. Honestly its an insult,” he says as he skitters down the ally towards the gun. The Bat watches him, snatching his attacker without actually looking at them as they attempt to flee and he does it with ease.

“What are you doing?” he asks as Tony reaches the gun.

Tony wrinkles his nose, “dude, get a better voice mod. You sound like a fucking demon who smokes four packs a day.” He picks up the gun and disassembles it with minor difficulties due to the absolutely garbage design and walks back over to Batman with the pieces. “Next time you get rid of a gun you might want to disassemble it or something first. No sense in leaving it lying around ready to use for the next person who comes across it. Seriously, do you know anything about gun safety?” he asks, shaking his head. Throwing guns around- literally- is some next level irresponsible stuff and Tony apparently made the mistake of thinking this information would constitute as common sense. Apparently not to Batman.

“You’re Welcome,” the Bat says in place of a response and that’s when Tony chooses to look up at the looming bat figure before him, catching his eye and he frowns.

“Bru-” is all he gets out before he sees the black of Bruce’s absurd costume move around him and his world goes dark.

*

When Tony wakes up its to Alfred leaning over him looking amused. “I always thought someone would figure it out if they got too close, though I must admit I wouldn’t have put my money on you,” he says.

Tony sits up, ignoring his swimming head. “Where’s Bruce?” he asks softly, rubbing his temples.

“Master Bruce is panicking in the bat cave,” Alfred tells him and Tony bursts out laughing.

“The _what_?” he asks, shaking his head. The _bat cave_? Oh Bruce had explaining to do before that comment but after? Tony wants to know _everything_ because it sounds far too good to pass up.

“You heard me,” Alfred tells him. “Now lets get down to business. Bruce has some misconceptions about you but its obvious you’ve become a weakness of his and not one he’s even aware of. He doesn’t do weakness though- I’ve ensured that- and you’ve taken him by surprise. I thought it was curiosity but obviously its more. I suggest you don’t break his heart.”

The ‘or else’ hangs heavily in the air and Tony sighs. “You raised a dude who spends his spare time fighting crime in a bat suit. I’m not that scared of you. Also you’re two days older than the earth itself,” he points out.

“He’s far more agile than he looks. And even if he wasn’t Alfred has a very… interesting skill set. Can you leave us alone for a moment?” Bruce asks. Alfred obviously considers saying no but he eventually nods and leaves the room, squeezing Bruce’s arm on the way out.

Bruce watches him go for a moment before he sighs and walks over to Tony. “How did you know?” he asks. They both know what he means.

“Your eyes. They’re a very specific shade of blue and even if that wasn’t true the way you were looking at me would have been a dead give away. You were worried about me, and I could see the familiarity there. Even if I didn’t guess you specifically I would have known you were someone I knew well who cares about me and was almost certainly male. Couple that with the blue eyes and you’re still the only person on that list,” he says. Simple deduction really.

Bruce frowns, “your list has to be longer than _that_ ,” he says but Tony shakes his head.

“Rhodey would have been my first choice if your build matched and your eyes were brown but that’s not true. Only other people who have blue eyes and give a shit about me are slight women who wouldn’t be so stupid as to bog themselves down with an ill fitting suit just to look like a guy. So that leaves you. And you don’t use a voice mod. Seriously, just because it sounds like a Furby face fucked you doesn’t mean I can’t recognize your voice. Use a fucking voice mod,” he says, rolling his eyes. “Oh, and literally everything about you makes _so_ much more sense knowing you have a weird habit of dressing up as an animal and beating people up in your spare time.”

“I try not to,” Bruce says. “Beat people,” he clarifies. “Most people just found themselves in bad positions- I can’t punish them for getting handed a bad situation. Or usually a long list of them. And I chose a bat because I’m afraid of them. I fell in a well as a child, right into a bunch of bats’ homes. I don’t blame them for swarming me now but then I was terrified.”

Tony raises an eyebrow, “you dress up… as your worst fear to fight crime? _Why_?” he asks, bewildered.

“My parents were killed when I was a child. The police didn’t do much, most were corrupt. It left an impression so I chose to train,” he says softly.

“Your parents died when you were…” he thinks about it, considering Bruce’s age when Bruce answers for him.

“Eight. I was eight.”

“So… all that work you do pretending to be a stupid party boy, that’s to cover for… the bat stuff?” he asks, frowning.

Bruce nods. “Only Alfred has ever known, no one else has ever even guessed and you’re not the only one I know well that I’ve run into,” he murmurs. He opens his mouth for a moment, then closes it, and then opens it again. “I don’t know how to deal with that,” he says softly.

Tony shuffles closer to Bruce and hugs him. “I don’t understand a single fucking thing about this dressing up as a bat and fighting crime in your shitty city with your even shitter cops because its all a lost cause but it’s noble. And _you’re_ noble. And good, and thoughtful, and generous, and a lot of other good things you don’t need to be. If you’re going to insist on being a weird crime fighting animal could you at least lose the fucking cape? Have you not seen The Incredibles? Capes are so inefficient.”

Bruce turns and pulls him into his lap, pressing his face into Tony’s neck. “Can you help? With my gear?” he asks. Tony nods because Bruce needs some serious fucking help and someone has to make sure he doesn’t die due to bad equipment and a flare for the dramatic.

*

“Its not going to go badly,” Tony tells Bruce.

“I can guarantee it will,” he says.

Maybe if Rhodey knew about Bruce’s extra curricular activities but since Bruce keeps the bat nocturnal most of the time he doubts things will go badly. “Bruce, you’re a pretty white guy. If he even remembers you in a week I’ll be shocked. You look near identical to like five of my exes. Maybe six but Strange lived up to his name and vaguely resembled an alien. Point is you’ll do fine.” Rhodey will have to clarify his name seventy times with Tony to remember his name and Tony will have to wonder what about the name ‘Bruce’ makes it hard to remember and then Rhodey will get it and they’ll continue on.

Bruce frowns, “an alien?” he asks and Tony sighs.

“I was going through a phase, leave me be. You’ll be fine though, seriously, Rhodey has a terrible memory for who I’m dating anyways so even if you do manage to leave a bad impression he’ll forget it anyways,” he says. The exception to that was Stephen, which resulted in Rhodey telling Tony point blank to dump him with no regard for Stephen being right there. But Bruce wouldn’t be put in that position because he’s sweet and he’s good for Tony and Rhodey will be automatically endeared to anyone who managed to get him out of his rat hole apartment. Truth be told Tony has missed luxury and Bruce’s mansion feels more like him than any other house he’s been in. Probably because Bruce lives in it.

He sighs. “I suppose we should get this over with, hmm?” he asks and Tony nods.

“He’ll like you. I know he will. And even if he doesn’t I’m not really known for listening well,” he points out. Which Bruce knows well now thanks to their working together on his bat designs. Thanks to one Lois Lane sticking her nose where it doesn’t belong Tony had had to come up with all sorts of new and wild things he normally wouldn’t spend time on but getting out of his comfort zone has been fun. And the bat theme has proven interesting too, so there’s that.

When Rhodey finally does show up things go as well as Tony predicted they would, though Bruce _does_ manage to leave a lasting impression when he wins a game of darts without ever looking at the board. Rhodey doesn’t catch on to how he managed but Tony knew he had been looking at the board in the reflections of things around the room. Regardless the end result is Rhodey giving their relationship a stamp of approval and that’s what they really wanted anyways.

**Author's Note:**

> [My writing Tumblr](https://tenspencerriedplease.tumblr.com/)


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